Which Way Are You Looking?

Over and over Scripture tells us to look up. Look to Jesus. Look forward (for the joy set before Him, Jesus endured the Cross). It is so easy to focus on the problems or circumstances, feelings or physical pain of the moment. This circumstance is usually screaming "Pay Attention to ME". How do you then turn away and look up or forward? I have watched my Lord over and over gently point me in that positive direction. I must get very quiet to see or hear His direction. Even getting quiet is not the natural human reaction to a problem. Do you remember a parent or teacher telling you to count to 10 before you respond in anger? Maybe in those 10 seconds, we can allow our emotions to separate themselves from our thoughts and especially our words. In those moments we have the opportunity to look up and see His answer, His words, His plans and choose His response. I had that opportunity the other day, when a person that I was counseling responded sarcastically to a comment that I had made. I felt that fire inside and a equally sarcastic comment was forming in my mouth. I was able to count and pray. Out of my mouth came an apology for the miscommunication. The person accepted the apology and then offered one of their own. I really believe that only God can keep us humans in loving relationships. We are so focused on our own pain that we forget to look up and see the pain He endured to free us. Those whom God has freed are free indeed. God bless you my loved ones.

Routines

I still can't catch my breath. Even though it has been 2 plus years of being a widow, everyday my mind,emotions, and body beat differently than they did before. Actually, my heart skips beats that were regular. I question these changes all the time and wonder when I will settle into a new routine, one that has some predictable or at least recognizable patterns. I think about ways to honor my previous life and try to listen to God's directions to follow His plan for my future. Remember, He knows the plans that He has for me. They are for a hope and a future. I spend time with a lot of people who haven't had this complete of a distruption. When with them, I can't help wondering if they would do something different, better, or worse than I am. I know, I know, don't compare. Not easy. I have learned to live one day at a time. And, I have found grace in those 24 hours. I am looking for something that I can't make happen. Maybe you are too. I think that something, is knowing the purpose is still there. After a dream is gone, is there a new one and did the old one just end. Again, I have found His Grace in focusing on the Big Future. His coming Kingdom. But, where is the little purpose that provides routines and comfort zones. Let's consider that the "little purpose" is faithfulness. It is like that sweet kindergarden child ( my Seth or Ava) They will learn their purpose as they complete those worksheets and learn how to read. I see it, Lord. Forgive me again for impatience. I pray for you and me to have patience to be faithful in the little things. I will not despise the day of small steps. I love you.